Once, a girl I dated saw me playing a video game on my mobile phone. She sneered and said “you’re so old and yet you’re still playing video games? Shouldn’t you think of how to earn more money?”
Naturally, I dumped her ass and went back to it.
She was a worst-case scenario, but still, I feel that gaming has a bit of stigma to it these days. It’s just not as sexy telling a girl “I love gaming,” compared to “I love horseback archery” or “I love playing the stock market.”
As a gamer myself, I thought I’d clear the air and maybe dispel a few misconceptions about gaming. Girls, here are a few reasons why dating a gamer isn’t as bad as you think.
Gaming Can Actually Be Art
I think girls appreciate a man who enjoys watching films or reading books. Gaming is no different – it’s (potentially) art.
The word ‘game’ might invoke images of an (ex) boyfriend sitting for hours in front of the computer playing Counterstrike or Dota. Yes, those are just some of the popular game genres. They don’t have as much depth, but they’re good in a different way – we’ll get to them a bit later.
For now, you should know that those two don’t represent all games. There are other types of games too, some of which have the most heartfelt stories ever written.
The game I just linked – playing it changed my life. It’s made me rethink about what I really want from a relationship, and from Life in general.
I was depressed for a month after finishing the game, and it’s not just me – lots of other people who played it felt the same way.
That’s just one example. Horizon Zero Dawn’s Aloy is one of the most popular female game characters. If you didn’t know any better, you’d probably imagine her looking something like this:
Well, not quite. This is what she actually looks like:
Yup, that’s right – it’s the rare heroine who isn’t sexualized. For an industry where more than half of its consumers are male, that’s impressive.
Being a multi-million, award-winning game purely from its engaging storyline and complex character development is a testament to just how good the game is.
And that’s art.
So girls, if you like a guy who loves films and books, then appreciate a guy who loves games too. They’ve got just as much depth and appreciation for art as anyone else.
Here’s another reason why gamer guys aren’t bad…
Gamer Guys Are Smart Lads
…according to this article at least. Apparently, two of the world’s most popular games – League of Legends and Dota2 – act like IQ tests, which develop quick reflexes and strategic thinking.
Players who play this game also score well on traditional intelligence tests, which means that these games might actually make you smarter.
Of course, I’m not suggesting that guys who game are going to automatically understand the Venezuelan economic crisis for example. But if you link an article about it to them, they might grasp the concept a little faster than non-gaming guys maybe?
I don’t know. But I do know guys who game like puzzles and challenges. They like having that mental stimulation. So dating a gamer guy could potentially be intellectually fulfilling.
Of course, it’s not a guarantee that gamer guys will be smart. But if you’re looking for signs that a guy engages with his mental faculties regularly, then gaming is as good an indicator as any.
Here’s another reason why gamer guys are not bad picks,
Guys Who Game Can Appreciate Personal Time
Ladies, are you sick of possessive (ex)boyfriends? Ever felt suffocated and wanted space to do your own thing?
Well, date a gamer. Gamer guys appreciate personal time, simply because they need it too.
My ex and I, she loved clubbing while I loved gaming. So on Friday nights, she’d go out drinking with her friends, while I would stay home and play Dota.
We didn’t work out, but I’d say that was one of the healthier aspects of our relationship. I liked it, and it’s something I’d expect out of my next one.
Couples don’t have to do everything together – sometimes you just need to do your own thing and recharge. Gamer guys understand this. So, while he’s busy burying an axe into an Ogre’s head, why not go out there and indulge in your own hobbies?
Of course, there’s the danger that us gamer guys might spend all our time gaming, and not enough time with you. That’s when we try to get you into gaming and offer to teach you how to play.
Some girls dismiss this as some ‘crazy gamer boyfriend thing’, but it’s a bigger gesture than you think, because…
It’s a Great Way to Build a Partnership
When we ask you to play Dota with us, we’re asking you to literally be a teammate. We actually need your help to kick the enemy team’s ass.
And unlike most sports, where it’s harder for women and men to play together, gaming is an equal opportunity activity. You don’t have to be as fit or as strong as your boyfriend – if you can operate a mouse and keyboard, you can play.
The great thing about multiplayer games is that it’s an active experience – rather than just sit in a cinema watching a movie, you actually have to work with each other to achieve an objective. You develop teamwork and build a relationship where both of you contribute.
Additionally, playing games and just doing a fun activity together is key to maintaining a long-term, romantic relationship. For men, they build intimacy and friendship when they have a shared activity with their partners, and that includes gaming.
In a way, you can say it’s easier to connect to men who game because gaming is more accessible to women compared to sports, for example. Female gamers make up for a little less than half of the gaming community, so don’t be afraid to join him!
And finally, here’s a reason why you should date a gamer…
You Might Actually Enjoy Gaming Too
Of course, you don’t need a man to get into gaming – you can do it yourself. But if you’ve always been curious and never tried, a gamer boyfriend might be the perfect way to get into it.
Gaming can be difficult for newbies, so having someone guide you and pick out a game which you might like is the best introduction. And if you find out it’s ultimately not for you, then at least you get to try something new.
So ladies, next time you see a Tinder profile which lists gaming as a hobby, maybe swipe right and give it a go – you might be pleasantly surprised.
For more articles by Khairie, read 4 Practical Tips for Getting Yourself out of a Rut, and 4 Signs You’re in a Toxic Friendship (And Why You Need to Leave).