This is the story of a Malaysian waitress working in a bar in Kuala Lumpur, who shares her experience of being harassed while on the job. According to her, this is an almost daily occurrence—and she urges that employers need to protect their staff.
Leena is a 23-year-old woman from Sabah. A year ago, she came to KL in search of better opportunities. Since then, she has worked in multiple eateries and bars across the city.
“I used to work as a waitress back home in Sabah as well, so I’m familiar with how things work,” she shares. However, she notes that one huge difference she only experienced in KL is the etiquette of the patrons at the bars she works in.
“As part of being a server, I need to be friendly to my customers—it’s a customer service job after all. However, some of the male customers become too friendly when they see I’m being nice to them. Somehow, they think it’s an invitation to be inappropriate.”
She mentions that customers often ask for her phone number, and some even ask her to sit with them and have a drink. “Once they get drunk, they lose all sense of respect.”
Leena recalls how men would often place their hands on her lower back or touch her inappropriately when she got close to serve their food or drinks. “It gets even worse when the whole table is just a group of guys.”
Employers should be protectors
Leena believes it is the responsibility of the manager or owner to ensure staff have a safe work environment. She shares a story about when she went to her boss to report harassment. “The only thing they said was that ‘we need to keep customers happy.’ They refused to kick the customers out because it would be bad for business and they would lose money.”
As a staff member in a restaurant or bar, she feels safety should be a priority in order to do her job well. She doesn’t want to appear rude to customers but is afraid that if she’s too friendly, she might send the wrong message.
Even in a previous restaurant bar owned by a woman, she says the situation was no different. “I went to my boss after a customer made inappropriate comments about my body, but her response threw me off—she told me that particular customer was an investor in the restaurant, so we couldn’t say anything.” Leena made the tough decision to leave that job shortly after, as she felt completely disrespected.
It’s not just the men
Leena also points out that it isn’t only men who made her uncomfortable. Some of the worst verbal abuse came from women. “Once, a lady shouted at me because of a mistake that the kitchen made. As a server, I had no arguments to give besides apologizing and making a new order.”
She often gets screamed at by customers, especially when mistakes happen. “Once, I forgot to key in an order because we were a full house of 50 tables and there were just two servers. I forgot to bring one of the drinks and the customer berated me in front of the whole restaurant, shouting profanities.”
The manager sided with the customer. “The customer made a complaint, and the manager reprimanded me. He told me he had to give them their meal for free and that the cost would be deducted from my pay. In the end, their RM200 bill was taken from my salary—that was around 20 hours of work.”
Despite these challenges, Leena says her experience in the service industry has taught her resilience. “When people have a bad day, they like to take it out on others. But I’ve also had customers who make my day—whether by being kind about my mistakes or when they tip me for my work.”
She believes the way people treat wait staff reveals a lot about who they are. “You’re really able to see the character of a person based on the way they treat the waiters.”
Write in. Tell your story. Get paid.
Share your story on our Facebook page and you may become a contributor for In Real Life Malaysia.
More from Sexual Assault
“A Lie Destroyed My Life,” Shares M’sian Man Who Was Accused of Assaulting His Female Cousin
This story is about how one lie destroyed one M’sian man’s relationship with his family, costing him his self-confidence and …
