This story is about a Malaysian man who fell into RM55,000 of BNPL debt and spent two years fighting his way out.
Two years ago, I was staring at the worst financial mistakes of my life. I’d graduated with just RM10,000 in student loans – not bad, not great but easy enough to manage on a fresh graduate salary. But a year and half later, and I had massive debt: RM55,000 in Buy Now Pay Later (BNPL) debt.
That was more than my entire four year degree.
BNPL is marketed as painless. Easy instalments. No interest — if you pay on time. And sure, it can be harmless if you know exactly what you’re doing. I didn’t, but I thought I did. That’s how it got me. And I had not only destroyed my bank account and personal finance, but also wrecked my social life and my relationship. It would cost me two years of my twenties to get out of it. Here’s how it began.
Life Before BNPL
As a fresh graduate from your average middle class Malaysian Chinese household, I landed my first job as a graphic designer — salary of RM3,750.00 — because I’d graduated near the top of my class, nailed my internship and had a portfolio of work. I felt good.
I was living alone and renting a single room with my own bathroom for RM1,500.00. I was saving a little with EPF and even investing a little. I was feeling good, independent but with momentum. When my first paycheck hit my account there was a rush of freedom from being a broke university student.
The Early Days — Buy Now Pay Later.
My first BNPL was through an orange themed online shopping app. When I started, BNPL felt harmless because I was careful. I bought and paid for small luxuries like a game for my PS5, a nice meal. Then it became groceries, then food delivery.
Then I was buying gifts for family and friends. It was tap now, pay later and since money wasn’t leaving my accounts immediately, it didn’t feel like I was spending anything. That’s the trap.
Sliding Into Debt
6 months in and I was drowning with debt totalling RM55,000.00. Looking back, there wasn’t a single massive purchase. Just constant small impulse purchases that quickly stacked up. It wasn’t interest charges because there wasn’t any. It was all in the fine print: From late fees to penalties and additional processing fees.
It was all there in the fine print under bright “0%” labels and friendly reminders to make sure you paid on time. When I realized that my monthly minimum payment was TRIPLE my monthly rent, I knew I was in way over my head.
Emotionally Scarred, Social Isolation
Maybe I noticed there was an issue early on, but I ignored it. It was embarrassing for me. I had avoided credit cards and debt in uni but managed to destroy myself right after graduation and starting work.
My social life crashed because I couldn’t finance it anymore with cash or anymore BNPL. I did the only thing I could do and cut back on every: Cancelled memberships, and subscriptions wherever I could. Downgraded what I couldn’t live without. I stopped going out, stopped answering invites. Friends started asking if I was okay. I was not.
My girlfriend also left me when the gifts, dates and fun times stopped. I told her about my debt. Probably just as well she left when I ran out of money.
The Hustle and the Grind
I could’ve asked my parents to bail me out of my mess but I didn’t want to dump this on them. I built a strict budget and locked in, targeting repayment of RM1,500 per month. RM2,000.00 if I could. That meant stacking side hustles on top of my day job.
I started out with Grab and GrabFood, then added on Lalamove, GoGetter and PetsBacker. Then I realized I could make more doing freelance graphic design and switched to working via Fiverr, Freelancer and Upwork.
My parents’ support was indirect but crucial as I moved back home. I was living rent-free, sharing meals, utilities and the internet was paid for.
I did chip in for groceries and utilities monthly, but moving home meant what I normally spent on rent was immediately spent on clearing my debt instead.
The days blurred into weeks and then months: Graphic Designer by day. Freelance graphic designer by night. GoGetter and PetsBacker on the weekend.
Final Payment and Freedom
It took 24 months, but I paid every cent back. When I made the last payment, I didn’t throw a party. I didn’t buy anything. I switched my phone off, collapsed in bed, and slept for 18 hours straight.
The anxiety about missing payments and winding up deeper in debt vanished. So did my panic attacks. My chest didn’t feel like it was in a vice anymore. I don’t think I had a single nightmare during that first truly peaceful night of deep sleep in over a year.
Moving Forward Debt Free
Today, I’m finally debt-free and I plan to stay that way. I can see that some debts will be necessary – like mortgage and car loan – but otherwise I don’t ever want to be back in that kind of financial hellhole. I still have a strict budget and I’m living below my means, saving before I spend but I’ve earned the right to enjoy life’s little luxuries: The occasional trip to Starbucks, Netflix, the odd carefully planned and budgeted online purchase.
I have taken steps to protect my financial freedom:
- I have two credit cards instead of six like I used to. One is for emergencies, the other is for regular use.
- Only one E-wallet: Touch ‘n Go. And one banking app with my regular bank.
- I keep things unlinked so that I’m forced to manually enter credit card information. This slows me down and kills the urge to impulse purchase.
My side hustles have been scaled back but doing that is a nice way to make a little extra money to save, invest and sometimes spend instead of patching over financial mistakes.
Living within my means feels restrictive sometimes but I live by the rule that if I can’t afford it in cash, I can’t afford to buy it now and pay for it later. For those who read this, my advice is that BNPL isn’t free money. It is debt disguised as convenience.
But I’m debt-free and financially secure, I’ve realised something money can’t buy: Real freedom.
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