Disclaimer: In Real Life is a platform for everyday people to share their experiences and voices. All articles are personal stories and do not necessarily echo In Real Life’s sentiments.
[image taken by the author]
I work hard but since my father passed away six years ago, back when I was 25, all of his burdens went to me.
When I compare myself to my friends who are of the same age, they’ve achieved a lot already. They have their own homes, their own cars and everything.
I work at a bank doing AMLA (Anti-Money Laundering) and I have a decent salary.
But in my case, more than half of my salary is given to my family. I can’t even afford a car for myself.
When I look at myself in the mirror, I realise… I really could use some self-pampering. I should really treat myself.
I have 2 sisters and 1 niece. One of my sisters, the eldest, works as a babysitter. My other sister is also working but she is a single mother whose husband passed away.
I’m the youngest and only son, so I’m the breadwinner in the family.
My Mother’s Perseverance
My mum is considered as orang susah. The highest education she received was SPM level. But she was able to work until she was 60 to feed her children!
[source: kamaji ogino on pexels]
Meanwhile, at 31 years old, I have already started thinking about how I want to quit working and how stressed I feel about having to take care of the family.
I’m really grateful that she was willing to work for as long as she did.
Now it’s my turn to take care of us. Still, it is definitely hard because the cost of living is higher now.
And the kind of work today – the bank work I’m doing – is very fast-paced, so it definitely has an effect on my mental health.
Spoiled & Lazy Generation? Or Harder Circumstances?
I question how people back then were able to work until they were 60 years old, but people like myself feel like quitting at 30!
[source: maaz kalia on pexels]
I’m not sure if our generation is just manja (spoiled) or if the work stress has increased, but I don’t know if I want to work until I’m 60 because of the mental toll that has affected me.
Man In The Mirror
I think it’s good practice to just look at yourself in the mirror and repeat affirmations to yourself out loud.
[image taken by the author]
I came here today to try this ‘Mirror Work’ experiment, where you stare at a mirror for 5 minutes while repeating a few positive affirmations.
When I did it earlier, I could see all the wrinkles on my face and I actually noticed how tired I looked. While I was looking at my reflection, I was thinking about how I really needed to rest. I felt like I needed more time for myself as I had really overworked myself to feed my family (my parents and my sister).
I thought about how I’m always contributing to my family, but I never treated myself.
But everyone has their own struggles, they have their own stories. The things that we experience are what make us stronger in the end.
The Mirror Work Experiment was organized by Reconnect & Recharge, a wellness and self-care hub that empowers people to lead healthy wholesome and meaningful lives. Head over to this link to find out more about their work.
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