Disclaimer: In Real Life is a platform for everyday people to share their experiences and voices. All articles are personal stories and do not necessarily echo In Real Life’s sentiments.
Before this year, I had never known how Deepavali was celebrated nor the preparations one takes necessary for the day. Despite being curious, I’ve mostly kept myself from asking my Indian friends about it out of fear that I may be disrespectful.
As I enter adulthood, I realise how most people would love to share about their culture. So this year, I celebrated Deepavali with my Indian friend from Kedah, where I gained a lot of insight from him and his family!
Here are 5 interesting facts and etiquette to know before going to a Deepavali Open House and a Hindu Temple.
A Visit From Goddess Lakshmi
The days leading up to Deepavali would have many Indians beautifying and cleaning their homes! This is because of the belief whereby the Goddess Lakshmi would only step into a clean house to bring her blessing to the family living in it.
On the first day of Deepavali, my friends and I sat in the living space in front of the home’s sliding door entrance. When a family member went to close the curtains for that sliding door, a gust of wind pushed in, opening the entire home to the beautiful weather outside!“She’s here!” exclaimed my Indian friend before running off to the back to open the door to their home’s prayer room.
He explains that the prayer room is meant to act as a resting place for the Goddess to stay in.
Wearing Bright, Colorful Outfits
My friends and I weren’t sure what would be appropriate for us to wear for the open house. Our Indian friend said to avoid dark colours and suggested that we wear bright or light-coloured clothes!
It is a traditional belief that bright and colourful clothes represent a celebration of light over darkness.The most fun part about this was that our friend’s family had shared their clothes with us to wear during our visit to the temple as well!
As Malaysians generally share their culture with each other, the term “cultural appropriation” may not apply the same way Western society may see it. Instead, sharing such culture is celebrated during festivities!
What should I bring to an open house?
Usually, guests are not expected to bring gifts when attending an open house. But, if you feel uncomfortable with the thought of coming empty-handed, there are some things to take note of.
First, potluck culture is not common in an Indian household as most Indians have their own cultural tradition of preparing dishes for their guests. Plus, even in other cultures, it is generally seen as disrespectful if you eat your own food rather than what your host has served.
Instead of food or drinks, guests can bring sweets or flowers to their host’s home!
On the night before Deepavali, my friends and I had thought of getting soda water to bring for the open house, but our friend had stopped us! We didn’t have the chance to get anything else as we weren’t aware of what was an appropriate gift to bring. So, we, unfortunately, came empty-handed…
Still, our friend’s mother was very nice to us about it. And the food they made was absolutely out of this world.
Appreciating Indian Cuisine!
While Malaysia celebrates the joy of eating delicious food, we can’t ignore that many claims to be “picky eaters”. For those of you who are incapable of appreciating Indian Cuisine, we may need you to sit this out.
It may be considered very rude to go to someone’s open house only to deny the food served to you. Either way, you’d miss out if you said no to these foods!
Our friend’s mother, Amma, had spent the whole day preparing 5 side dishes to be eaten with rice served on banana leaves! She would serve us Chicken 65, Dhaal, Mutton Masala and 2 vegetable dishes.
The next day, she would serve us Thosai and Chutney with leftover Dhaal. Suffice it to say, we were very much taken care of by Amma.We also helped with cooking the thosai, which is very similar to how Malays make lempeng!
Aside from the different ingredients used, cooking it on a flat pan was like activating our muscle memory. All those years of making pancakes and lempeng truly came in handy then.
Going To The Temple
The temple that we went to had a rich history. According to our friend’s father, this temple was built by the first generation of Indians in Kedah. They were brought into Malaysia to construct the railways. That’s why it was so close to the train tracks! They would even call it the Train Track Temple.
Our friend and his family had come out of their car barefoot and wearing beautiful traditional outfits. We were told to take off our shoes and slippers before washing our feet to enter the temple.
Around the temple area were other structures that housed different Hindu Gods within the belief. There were certain areas which only the priest could step on.
So, if you are going to a temple, consider this fact and make sure to bring someone knowledgeable to guide you around the boundaries of your presence!
My friend and his family had to return to their respective workplace and colleges in KL. Thus, they would also have to face the hellish traffic jams that make a 5-hour drive turn into an 11-hour drive!
Although we were only able to celebrate 2 days with our friend and his family, it was truly a wonderful time.
We learnt a lot about how our friend and his family celebrated their Deepavali.
We also saw the hardships that they went through as they were given so little time to prepare for the festivities.
This celebration truly opened our eyes to the beauty of other people’s cultures, and their fantastic foods!
Know anyone with an interesting story to share? Drop us an email at hello@inreallife.my and we may feature the story!
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