There's always this dilemma that haunts mothers everywhere :\u00a0 Should we stay at home and take care of the children, or should we continue working at our careers? It\u2019s truly a case of damned if you do, damned if you don\u2019t. Even society is divided on this. When the government increased maternity leave from 60 days to 90 days in their #Budget2020, this was met with some controversy, with entrepreneur Christie Ng saying it's a 'double-edged sword" that's unfair to employers. There are certainly those who see it as a waste of talent, particularly if the women are brilliant at their jobs and have impressive educational and career backgrounds.\u00a0 But some think it's more beneficial for a mom to stay at home and take care of the family household.\u00a0 Being with your children, after all, is better for their emotional growth. I asked three moms to relay their experiences with juggling careers and motherhood. Jing Lee suffered from separation anxiety Jing Lee (not her real name) is a first-time mom who went back to work right after her confinement period ended.\u00a0 \u201cI\u00a0 continued working throughout my pregnancy, and after I gave birth, I was pretty sure that I\u2019d be able to go back to work in an instant!\u201d She said ruefully.\u00a0\u00a0 But after baby Ben arrived, she hesitated and was anxious about leaving him. She contemplated resigning. But her husband couldn\u2019t bear the financial burden on the family expenses on his own. After her maternity leave ended, she went back to work, reluctantly. She said, \u201cIt was an extremely difficult decision,\u00a0 but we found a really good nanny.\u201d But the nanny came with a hefty price \u2013 all the more reason Jing Lee had to return to work. Almost a year on, she\u2019s started to feel at ease leaving her baby, but still struggles to control her emotions and anxiety. Jing Lee said, \u201cI can\u2019t wait to go home right after work so I can be reunited again with baby Ben.\u201d She calls the nanny every two hours to check up on Ben. When she started work, it used to be half-an-hour phone calls.\u00a0 Ying Wan treats her job like a break from the real work On the contrary, Ying Wan (not her real name) treated her work at the office as a getaway, an escape from her three kids.\u00a0 \u201cWell, to an extent, from my husband too,\u201d she chuckled. That doesn\u2019t mean that she loves them any less though.\u00a0 \u201cThis is just my way of coping with life as a mom.\u201d Ying Wan considers herself quite lucky, since she\u2019s been with her current company for quite some time, and the Management allows her to have flexible hours.\u00a0 She\u2019s been given the green light to clock in earlier than everybody else as she needs to send her kids to the pre-school and nanny near her office. She\u2019ll pick up her kids during lunch hour and send them home, then take some time off during the afternoon. However, the catch is that she has to stay back at work for a little longer, when everybody else has gone home. \u201cBut I don\u2019t mind that at all though. My husband has his own business, so he\u2019s able to be with the kids in the afternoon and evening.\u201d The plus point is, not everybody clocks off immediately after work, as they want to avoid the rush hour.\u00a0So Ying Wan can still socialise and have her own \u2018me time\u2019. Liza is a full-time mom with a high-flying husband Liza (not her real name) left her job as a lecturer to care for her kids. That was \u201can easy decision\u201d for her, she says. \u201cI didn\u2019t want to leave my kids with anyone. I have serious trust issues,\u201d she confided. As a matter of fact, she also home schools her kids.\u00a0 \u201cAt least I\u2019m using my brain up to its full capacity, although sometimes it feels like it can burst anytime!\u201d She exclaims. Liza comes from quite a well-off family, and her husband is a top man at a huge shipping company, so they don\u2019t worry much about the household income. \u201cMy husband puts food on the table, and I take great care of the family. That\u2019s enough for us.\u201d She says. As for me, I became a freelancer\u00a0 I started to freelance even before my baby was born.\u00a0 The plan was to send her to my mom\u2019s at the kampung, and go home once every two days once I am back to the work force full time. However, the moment she was born, I couldn\u2019t bear the idea of being separated from her. Especially since my work will involve late nights and weekends. So I started to freelance again. Some clients don\u2019t mind her tagging along at events and meetings (she\u2019s a really well-behaved and adorable). But I do understand the social awkwardness of having her around \u2013 especially when she wants to be fed or have her \u2018off moments\u2019. I\u2019ve toyed with the idea of going back to full time work force again. I\u2019ve received a few job offers after going for interviews. But I just couldn\u2019t put my baby under the care of strangers. I\u2019ve heard way too many scary stories and tragedies involving babies who are under their nanny\u2019s care. Tragically, some babies have even died while in the care of their nannies, like the poor child who choked on his milk in Melaka. I am well aware that my husband and I need the money. Well, who doesn\u2019t? However, the priority now is our baby. I\u2019ve drawn some flak from relatives and friends who think I am wasting my years, having been educated overseas and with my existing job skills and resources. At the risk of sounding harsh - they should mind their own business. Women have the right to choose whether to stay at home with their kids or go back to work. It doesn\u2019t mean one is losing out on things \u2013 People, especially their loved ones just need to respect their choice. \u201cGet rid of the guilt. When you're at one place, don't feel bad that you're not at work; when you're at work, don't feel bad that you're not at home" - Katie Couric, journalist, author, mother. Are you a woman who can juggle both careers and family?\u00a0 Let us know how you do it in the comments! For more stories about motherhood, read How \u2018Aunting\u2019 Helped Me Become a Mother and Millennial Motherhood: Here\u2019s What It\u2019s like Being a Malaysian Mom Today.