Aileen is my organised, meticulous, and disciplined wife – the total opposite of me.
But if I were to be honest, she’s actually a ‘Queen Controller’ – known locally as wives who control their husbands’ activities and well, basically everything about them.
But then again, I let her be one. Here’s my story:
I met Aileen at a work party and we hit it off well. We were aware of our opposing personalities, but we were too drawn to each other to think much about them.
We dated for a while, but oddly enough my friends never wanted to hang out with me whenever she was around. They kept saying I was a different person when I’m with her, that I’ve changed.
When I told Aileen about it, she just brushed it off saying that they were jealous of me, and that I was changing for the better. Well, I knew I had changed a bit.
I used to enjoy waking up late after a late night out with the boys, eating fast food, smoking, wearing scruffy (though to me it was stylish) clothes.
But I let them all go because Aileen asked me to leave that lifestyle. It was for my betterment, I thought, so I did.
It didn’t take long before I became the joke among my friends. They said I’d morphed into becoming Aileen’s pet, as I’ve started to do things just because she asked me to. But things like wearing suits, loafers, using body moisturiser, hair conditioner – there were normal right?
After all, she said all these will make me feel and look better. And it’s true!
Just like what the boys did, she then started to criticise them, saying that they are bad influences on me and that I should stop seeing them and make new, ‘classy’ friends. Again, I thought nothing but that she wanted the best for me, so I hung out less with them.
Of course, that didn’t go down well with my friends. They said that I was under her leash. But for the sake of my relationship, I ignored those comments.
Not long after, I proposed to Aileen. Though I’d wanted a small, intimate ceremony, we got married in grandeur, complete with Cinderella-like horse carriage. It was all on me, as I earned more than her, and I just wanted her to be happy.
We lived with my in-laws, as Aileen couldn’t stand being apart from her mother. It was fine by me, as long as she was happy.
One day, Aileen asked for all my passwords, from bank accounts, insurance, savings, email addresses to my phone. “Just in case something happened to you, I’d know where to look for funds,” she said. Come to think of it that’s quite logical, right?
But then she also asked to keep my bank card. “I handle all the bills and payments anyway, so it’s better if I get quick access to the cash,” she reasoned.
When I told her I’d give her the money if she needed it, she sulked and refused to eat or drink anything. She claimed I didn’t trust her enough to let her handle things. Not wanting the argument to escalate, I gave in and let her have what she wanted.
Since that day onwards, I would get daily ‘allowances’ from Aileen. She said it was for my own good so that I don’t overspend or go out after work. “So that we’d get to spend more time together,” she said.
She would pick my daily clothes for work, for leisure, while at home, what to wear to sleep etc. “So that you’ll look stylish and presentable all the time,” she said.
She would fuss over my food and drink choices, and would order for me when we dined out. “So that you would be healthy and not get fat,” she said.
She would scan and check my phone at the end of the day, every day. “So that you’ll stay focused on your goals,” she said.
She would decide which time, or nights to have sex. “So that we could plan our little family,” she said.
She wears the pants in our marriage, and I let her.
You (and my friends) can call me Mr No Balls, Mr Coward, or Mr Sissy – serves me right to be treated that way by her. Yes I admit, it was my fault for not putting a firm foot at the beginning of the relationship.
At first I really thought she’d asked me to do those things for my own benefit. But then things just got out of hand, and by the time I realised I was being ‘Queen Controlled’, I’d loved her way too much to risk breaking up our relationship and marriage.
And you know what, to be honest it’s not too bad being Queen Controlled. It might not be every guy’s cup of tea, but at least I know she loves me enough to fuss over me. I don’t give a hoot what other people think about it either.
Like Aileen said – they’re probably just jealous that no one is taking care of them.