It may be strange to a lot of people, but I prefer being alone. Even when going for a movie or having a meal.
That’s not to say I don’t like people in my life; it’s just comforting to be on my own sometimes.
Sure, this self-isolation has its share of awkward moments. I’ve noticed other people staring at me a lot when I’m out alone. Nevertheless, I feel relaxed being out by myself.
Here’s why going out on your own shouldn’t freak you out, either.
You Deserve Time for Yourself
There’s a role I always play when I’m out with others – I become the sociable guy. But with my current job, it can be hard keeping up with friends.
I only have one day off – the other six days I’m working from 2.30 p.m. till 11 p.m. every day.
So even on my days off where I’m out with people and generally having a good time, I still think, it would be so much better being alone.
While these hangouts are fun and I enjoy spending time with friends, having to put on a mask in front of others is exhausting.
Sometimes, I feel like it would’ve been better to just go out for a latte, or just taking a sunset stroll by myself.
I’ve done it a couple of times – watched movies or went out on my own. Don’t get me wrong, company can be fun, but when I go home at the end of the day I just want to relax and not have to talk to anyone.
This isn’t a dig at anyone in particular. I’m not saying you should ditch people you know and become a recluse.
But go out on your own for a day and see how you feel at the end of it. It can be liberating!
You Call the Shots
Most of us have probably met all types of people. There are the party heads, the bookworms, the socialites, the gamers, the thrill seekers, etc.
So which category do I fit into? Honestly, none of the above.
I’m the type that prefers spending a whole night at a wrestling show rather than binge drinking. Or even going to a mamak for a cheese naan at midnight instead of playing the latest MOBA or battle royale game.
I’ll be honest, it’s hard finding people who share my tastes. What I’d like to do and what my friends want to do are usually completely different things.
We end up never doing what either of us want.
That’s fine, I’m not going to ditch them for other people. But instead of forcing my interests down their throats, or waiting for like-minded people to come around, I decided to go out by myself.
I tried new restaurants, watched movies nobody else is interested in, and shopped for clothes at H&M – all on my own. It was awesome.
Also, ever since graduating I’ve wanted to go on a short trip, a getaway from Kuching. The problem is, everyone is free at different times.
It was no surprise then that when AirAsia had a ticket sale for trips six months later, nobody wanted it.
So what did I do? I booked a flight for just me to Kota Kinabalu in October.
It’s a new experience, being on my own in a different city, but I look forward to it because I get to do the things I want in my time.
When you’re travelling solo, you can do what you want – no pesky planning or meeting each others’ schedules, no pickups and/or drop-offs – just you and your personal freedom.
You Get to Press the Pause Button on Life
Whenever I’m out with friends, life moves so quickly. Whenever we’re hanging out at a shopping mall or going around town, there’s never really time to take in what you’re doing.
Going back to the solo trip example from earlier, if I were with people I would probably miss out on some breathtaking sceneries.
I can see us being constantly on the move because someone wants to get as much done as possible, whereas I just want to relax and soak up the environment I’m in.
This probably happens in your life, too – you’re spending the whole night out with your friends and it’s a nonstop night of fun at a club.
But maybe you want to take some time to live in the moment instead of continuously jumping around chugging down beer. Pubs/ clubs are noisy places after all – there’s no chance of you actually relaxing.
Taking a break from all these social events and doing something on my own was nirvana for me.
As fun as those hangouts were, sometimes I just want to sit down in a cosy corner and put my feet up.
Take a break from your social group every once in a while and go for a sunset stroll through a park or riverside. You could even try just having coffee by yourself with a good book.
Who knows? You might enjoy being out by yourself just as much as being out with friends.
For more articles on being alone, read 3 Reasons Why You Should Absolutely Stay Single, and I Had Social Anxiety for 10 Years. Here’s How I Overcame It.